I have no idea who this red-heeled broad is, but she looks remarkably chipper, right? Like she’s having the time of her life in her organized-to-a-fare-thee-well walk-in mini-boutique?

In about three hours, that will be me. (Plus roughly 10 years, I’m guessing, and minus the stripper spikes…)

When Hubby dragged me, kicking and screaming, out of Manhattan and across the Hudson River two years ago, the carrot he dangled in front of me was a lovely home office all for me, equipped with a slamming closet. And for someone who’d basically been living like a caged Zhu Zhu Pet for decades (albeit happily), the lure of more space worked like a charm.

Right now, though, after a challenging week adjusting to my new drop-off and pick-up schedule, it looks like a bomb went off in here. In an upcoming blog post, I’ll address the changes I want to make in my office. But for right now, it’s time for me to enter Closet Country, Swiffer and Hefty Bags in tow.

To support my mission, I’ll be deploying some of the tactics I learned in a clutter-busting course I took that was taught by Patricia Diesel. She was / is hilarious, but also totally tough-love. On the first night of the class, she went around the room (of all women!) and asked us about our individual “issues.” Man, it was intense; some of these poor gals were definitely candidates for upcoming episodes of Hoarders.

I felt like a knucklehead-slash-impostor bemoaning my vast collection of beauty products and towering stacks of fashion magazines, but guess what? At the end of the day, too much of anything (with the possible exception of Chanel purses) can start to make your head explode.

I’ve got a lot of work to do, so I gotta motor. But before I scoot off, I wanted to share a few clutter-control books and flashcards that I’ve found really helpful…

Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui

Organizing from the Inside Out 50-Card Deck

It’s All Too Much: An Easy Plan for Living a Richer Life with Less Stuff

I have a few more faves in my clutter-book library (yes, I see the irony in that), but I don’t want to encourage hoarding. Write to me if you’d like to know what they are, and enjoy your Saturday while I’m cleaning…sniff sniff…xo