Beautiful Stranger co-founder Melissa Fedor swears by killer trousers, spendy shoes and finding your look and sticking to it. Yay uniforms!

I don’t get girl crushes very often, but I’ve had one on Melissa Fedor for 20-something years. Since way back when she was Beauty Editor of W, and I was just a cub beauty reporter for WWD.

When Melissa left for a big gig at Glamour, after a few plot twists, I eventually got her old W job. And I tried, and failed, to emulate her loveliness. She’s one of those people who is nice to everyone. Always.

And in addition to fantabulous people skills, Melissa is one seriously snappy dresser. That’s why it makes perfect sense that she and her partner Abby Wallach were waaaay ahead of the street style curve with Beautiful Stranger, their addictive “tell us about your look” site.

I ran into Melissa at a caviar launch party this summer (only in New York do you happen upon old pals at caviar launch parties), and it dawned on me that she would have great tips for my style-loving mamas.

And guess what? She does.

Dana: I think of you mostly as a pantsy, trousery girl. Am I wrong about that?

Melissa: I am a total trouser girl. I own more pants than I do shoes, which, for a girl who likes fashion, is not the norm. That doesn’t mean I don’t love and wear skirts and dresses, but pants are always my fall-back item, especially for evening. (I even tried to convince my daughter Bella, who’s 12, to dress up in trousers for one of the many Bar/Bat Mitzvahs she’s invited to. But she just gave me that mom-you’re-so-strange kinda look!)

It’s partly about ease (no need to worry about whether I’ve shaved my legs or have the legwear-of-the-moment in my drawer); partly due to the fact that Yves Saint Laurent’s pantsuits strutting down the runway said “hot” like no other evening ensemble I had ever laid eyes on; and partly due to the fact that I love pockets. Particularly the perfectly-placed position of trouser pockets. Sounds odd, maybe, but it feels so solid to have a place to put your hand(s) when standing around chatting at some business gathering or swanky soiree.

Dana: What are some of your favorite styles and cuts?

Melissa: Hands-down the best fitting trousers in my closet come from Etro. If you can get to the outlet at Woodbury Common, they’re a veritable bargain. I own everything from loose velvet trousers to a slim-fitting wool cargo style to silk cuffed pants from Etro, and they’re all fabulous. And I’ve had them all for years, and they’re classic and timeless.

Other faves: J. Crew and H&M. My top three jeans right now are from H&M. One pair is a stretchy black cargo pant; one is a super lightweight stretchy dark blue skinny, and one is a dark denim wide-leg style. They are as fab as any top-end jean and all cost just $39.99!

Dana: When I ran into you at that press event during the summer, you were wearing trousers and a tailored, short-sleeve button down shirt. And heels, but not too high. Putting aside for a moment that you’re tall (grrr…) and your legs are endless (double grrr…), is that a look that you feel has the right mix of comfort and polish?

Melissa: I love and almost always wear heels with trousers because you can never be tall enough and because it’s the simplest way to add polish to pants. But one of my favorite summer looks for day was a pair of white linen J. Crew trousers with a completely flat brown sandal trimmed in gold. And the pants were a little long, so, while they got a bit grimy by the end of day, I loved the look of my pants dragging a little bit. It really has more to do with my mood than any hard-and-fast rule when it comes to what shoes I’ll throw on.

Dana: Do you ever buy two pairs of the same pants and have them hemmed to different lengths, i.e., for flats and heels?

Melissa: I’ve never bought two of the same pair of pants and hemmed one. I’d sooner buy one pair and roll them up if I want a different look and spend the money on something totally different!

Dana: Okay, moving on from pants…in which category do you spend the biggest bucks? Shoes and boots? Purses? Coats? Conversely, what do you scrimp on?

Melissa: My paternal grandmother gave me this advice: “Treat your feet to expensive shoes.” So I do. And it’s totally worth it, as top-quality items last a long time. And I tend to buy things that are not super trendy, so that I can continue to wear them year after year. I’ve been wearing a pair of Prada high-heel sandals for the past 20 summers. And every year my go-to boots for fall and winter are a pair of Prada motorcycle boots I bought when my 15-year old son was 4.

I used to spend oodles on bags, as well, but I find it hard to justify now. Plus I’ve got such a slew of bags in my closet, I just tend to rotate them. My summer carryall was a 10-year old Prada bowling bag. My newest bag purchase, in fact, was a grey suede and leather H&M tote for $30. It’s totally rad and perfect for schlepping all that I need to schlep. I buy all of my basics (Ts & sweaters) at J. Crew but ONLY when they go on sale because everything always goes on sale.

My next splurge will probably be a coat. And that’s not to say that I won’t scrimp on a coat, as my current cape was bought on clearance at H&M for $20. But I’m feeling like it’s time for a fabulous investment coat! It’s a good thing my birthday and Christmas are up-coming!

Dana: Are you an ardent vintage shopper, or a “when the mood strikes” vintage shopper? Any tips and tricks you’d like to share? Or favorite haunts?

Melissa: I don’t really have the time to shop for vintage, although if I trip upon a great shop I always go in and rummage around. My mother-in-law gave me suitcases full of her party clothes from the 70s, so I’ve got quite a great pile from her. Plus, I used to get invited to the Chanel sample sales back when I was an editor at W and Glamour. And considering that was almost 20 years ago, I’ve got a pretty fab collection of my very own vintage.

Dana: Speaking of vintage, or recycled: The fact that I never go into the high-end consignment shops in Gotham just baffles me. I could probably be scoring so much great stuff, right?

Melissa: I do take my daughters to Brooklyn on occasion and shop the racks at stores like Beacon’s Closet. I like the idea of exposing them to one-of-a-kind items vs. the stuff at the mall that everyone is wearing.

Dana: Do you work from a must-haves | lust-haves list each season, or do you wing it?

Melissa: I buy based on a reaction to something specific I see and love. That could be to something I saw on the street, in a catalog or magazine, on a friend, in a store. I was recently shopping for a Christmas gift for my daughter and saw a beautiful brown, high-heeled boot from Prada that I can’t stop thinking about. They’re a bit pricey, so not sure I’ll actually buy them. But that’s the way I typically come up with my must-haves. By falling in love with a particular something and thinking about it non-stop.

Dana: Given what you do for a living, do you feel major pressure to dress well all the time? Like even on a quick run to the supermarket?

Melissa: I am a big believer in a “uniform,” as it makes it so much easier to get out the door each morning. In the summer, I was typically choosing between shorts and Ts or a simple dress. For fall, I’m just adding a cashmere sweater atop those same Ts and picking from one of those fave pair of H&M jeans to replace the shorts. And if I’m heading to the city, I just throw on a pair of slightly fancier shoes to the same outfit that took me to the market in the morning. I never take my jewelry off, so that’s a no-brainer.  And I always throw a big scarf in my bag–they instantly step-up an otherwise low-key look.

Dana: Any other words of style wisdom for my mamas?

Melissa: I have quite a few, actually!

• Wear what you feel really good in.
• Don’t feel compelled to follow trends.
• Don’t feel pressured to change up your look. When you find a look you love, stick with it.
• If you don’t like color, don’t wear it.
• If you can’t return it, don’t buy it.

Dana: Excellent! You’ve made me want to jump in the old SUV and head straight to Woodbury! xo