Deuce Box: New shoes, can’t lose. (Well, that might be bit of an overstatement…)

Festive, non? And functional, to boot.
Festive, non? And functional, to boot.

Ermahgerd, I leave for New York in 24 hours and I’m giving new meaning to the term “Not Ready.”

Although I shudder to think how much I need to check off the ol’ To Do list before I hop on that Jet Blue, I am counting. the. seconds. until I can hang with dear pals, see the swoon-worthy Vigée Le Brun exhibit at the Met, and possibly even smoke a Marlboro Light.

Wait, did I just cop to that?

Why yes, I just outed myself as a Gwyneth-esque, special occasion smoker. But don’t get yer knickers in a twist there, little missy. When I say special occasion, I mean like literally one measly, godforsaken ciggie per annum.

Besides, I’ve been very upfront about my deep fondness for smoking.

Now that we’ve got my…cough cough…terrible habits out of the way, let’s move on to my crazy-healthy obsession: TENNIS!

In my first installment of Deuce Box™ (“A Tennis Blog Within a Mommy Blog”™), I set as my Numéro Un goal the purchase of real, bonafide tennis shoes.

I’d been dragging my feet about that (get it?), mostly because real, bonafide tennis shoes are sooooo much heavier and clunkier than running shoes.

(Translation: They can be fugly.)

Plus, I’d seen some of the other ladies at my Racquet Club kind of limping around because their tennis shoes were driving them completely nutso.

But since I endeavor to do what I publicly state I will do, I made it my beeswax to get those damn shoes.

So on Friday, after a psychotically early-bird dinner and a pit-stop at Jo-Ann fabrics where I bought a really fierce and intimidating Loom Knitting Basics kit, I trundled over to Sports Authority to get those damn shoes already.

Each pair was fuglier than the last, but after much hemming and hawing, I landed on the NIKES pictured here.

When it comes to athletic footwear, I’m Team NIKE, 100 percent. The footbed (is that the right term?) is just a really good fit for me.

I’ve worn them a few times already – to two Cardio Tennis classes, my “Lost Losers” (jk) weekly group lesson and that dang Women’s Clinic I’m always whinging about – and I have to say they’ve made a huge difference so far.

I just feel so much more grounded, and stable.

Duh, Dana. That’s the entire raison d’être of tennis shoes. They adapt to specific surfaces (at my Club, it’s mainly soft, squishy Har-Tru), and they short-circuit a lot of the slipping and sliding.

Anyhoo, if you’re a beginner ςomme moi, and you’re living in fear of wearing uncomfy, downright ugly shoes, I highly recommend these numbers. They’re NIKE Women’s Air Vapor Advantage and, happily, they don’t cost an arm and a leg.

Man, I reeeeeeeeeally need to stop with the bad body-part puns. Right? Right.

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